Lessons I Learned from Stopping College

Through middle school, I would always get asked the question “what job do you want to do?” When I got to my freshman year of high school, that is when the question became way more frequent between me and my parents or counselor. In my junior year. The question “where do you want to go to college?” became the new frequent question. All my friends would be talking about what college they’re going to apply to and how we should all go to the same college. That was their dream but not mine. I never enjoyed school but always passed easily until COVID hit.

The year of 2020 was probably the worst year of my life. I was barely passing. And I was struggling mentally and in most of my classes. It felt like a part of me had left, but something that never left was the question “where do you want to go to college?” and “what do you want to be?” I always knew that I did not want to go to college, but my family pushed me to go to a community college. 

I started college in 2021. College, to me, was like the same thing as highschool, where you sit and listen to a teacher speak for hours. Then, you were judged by how well you did on a test of everything that you were told. I never knew what I was doing and what career I wanted to go in. I didn’t want to waste years and lots of money doing something that I felt absolutely no passion towards. I lasted a semester and a half at the community college. And when I told my family they were unhappy and were not supportive whatsoever. They kept telling me this is a “mistake” or “you are going to regret this later.” I also moved out of my family’s house in 2021 to move to a better environment for me. I never really had support from my family, but at my new house I had a lot of support in my decision to quit college and figure myself out while finding my own path. I was also supported. To explore different interests that I had been previously told were not viable career paths. Throughout most of my highschool years, and up until now, I have been working at a Tae Kwon Do school where I also trained. After I stopped college. I was focusing on work and what I wanted to do. This whole experience has taught me alot and transformed who I am as a person both in my confidence, perspective, and ability to learn and grow. 

Trust your gut

Through this experience, I learned you have to trust your gut. Everyone around me at the time was telling me how great college is for you and how it is the only way to get a good job. Deep down I knew this was not the only way, but it was the only way they knew how to be successful. I had no confidence. At the time, I was confused and was unsure of what other options I had. Instead of committing and suffering through the whole college route, I decided I am going to take control of my career and my own life. Yes, things are going to be uncomfortable or scary at first but you shouldn’t put yourself in a situation because everyone else is telling you it’s the right idea. Instead, you should trust what your gut and brain are telling you because if I did not stick with my gut I could still be in college, not even working towards a career where I feel any passion, and finally graduating with a pile of debt to show for it.

Do not always listen to the negativity

A healthy and constructive environment is essential to growth. Just like a flower. It is essential to have sun, water, good soil, and warm temperature to grow, humans need encouragement, praise, and affirmation. In my situation, I learned that you don’t have to listen to negative feedback, especially since it wasn't constructive. Constructive criticism is necessary. But to that you should pay attention. However, what I heard from people was often just tearing down my ideas or dismissing my thoughts before I ever got an opportunity to try it and I was often told I didn’t know anything because of my age and lack of experience. Thankfully, I entered a better learning environment. This environment helped me grow. And find what I love, and test things out and I was also able to find someone who supported my decisions without judgment, while still offering constructive criticism where necessary. 

You have time

When I first told them, I thought what they were saying was true and that I’ll regret it later. I thought I had to rush to figure out what I wanted to do, but I realized that doesn’t matter. I have time. To test what I enjoy and to learn in a different way. I am in the time of my life where it is probably one of the best times to really test out and figure out what excites me. Going through school you don’t learn what excites you, you learn what you think excites you until you get into that actual workforce, and realize this is not for you. I grew up in a wealthier area. So a lot of parents push for colleges in the community and most of them think if you get into a big name college, you will be set for the rest of your life. 

Takeaways 

It is crazy to think how one small or big decision can have such a major impact on someone’s life. For me that big decision was quitting college. And trusting my gut that this was the right decision for me. If I did not quit college, I probably would have never ended up in Praxis or where I am today. Yes, it was scary at first. But I learned that I have the time to figure it out and there is no need to rush. Lastly, don’t keep yourself in an unhealthy environment because everyone experiences things differently, but this experience was something that I learned many lessons from.

Written by Erick Perez-Nagle